Can you think of people who had positive lives without having some of
these needs satisfied?
The need is psychological and biological phenomena that arises with a
sense of absence and creates an urge for satisfaction. As a part of their
nature, human beings have needs and they need to get satisfied to live a happy
life. Food, shelter and security were the basic needs in early ages but through
all these years changing life conditions brought many other needs. The increase
in the number of human needs caused scholars to work on this issue and come up
with theories to classify and explain these needs, which go beyond the
essentials like food, water, shelter, etc.
Abraham Moslow developed his well-known study, hierarchy of needs
including both essential physical and non-physical elements required for human
growth and development and also those things humans are naturally driven to at
access. Moslow classified needs in a hierarchical order based on their order of
obtainment. In other words, Moslow put up a list starting with the first, which
deals with the most important needs for survival itself and going upwards with
latter needs. As human beings, we are only concerned about attaining higher
order needs, when we have lower order needs satisfied. If you think of it as a
pyramid, it starts with the basic items of breathing, food, water, and shelter.
These are followed by the needs of safety, than love or / belonging,
self-esteem and finally self-actualization.[i]
We can simply put needs into two groups; essential to survive needs and
non-essential ones. Essentials like breathing, food, and water are necessary
for a human to stay alive. On the other hand needs such as entertainment,
travelling and listening to music are not compulsory to live but we become
happy when those needs are satisfied. As long as the essential needs are
satisfied people might have positive lives without having some of these needs satisfied.
Besides the order of needs also depends on where you live, how old you are,
your gender, social status, career, etc. for instance if you are living in a
cold climate, then heating is higher order need compared to somebody living in
a hot climate. People living in a developed economy need a car to go to work,
do shopping, etc. but it is not so essential in a non-developed country with
small towns.
Jim Carrey once said "I wish everyone could experience being rich
and famous, so they would see it wasn't the answer to anything."
Can words lead to conflicts? What is conscious communication?
a. Sit for a moment and think of a time when you have experienced a
difficult conversation. What characterized that conversation?
b. What allows those people to stay connected to their compassionate
nature? What role has got language?
Communication is a vital part of our daily lives and it helps us to
communicate our feelings, ideas and information to one another. Right from when
we are born, we need communication to build the relationships needed to go on
with our lives. Rather than a one way process, communication is actually a
circular process involving both the person who is sending the message and the
one who is supposed to respond. A healthy communication happens when
communicated ideas and feelings are perceived by the listener without any
confusion or meaning loss. In case of a situation where healthy or conscious
communication is not ensured, the process might lead to tension and conflict
between different parties.
Sometimes the things you say, actions you take, or even the way you get
dressed may actually prevents a conscious communication and cause further
problems during a conversation. For instance criticizing and judging creates a
feeling of anger and listener might feel like unperceived and aggrieved. Before
making assumptions and acting on prejudices you should first let people talk
and feel understood. A disagreement is nothing more than two sides who demand
to be understood at the same moment. If you set aside your wants and try to
center upon on understanding the other person, you will have a chance to
prevent conflict.
I once had a difficult conversation with my friends to pick a restaurant
for birthday dinner. Two different friends had two suggestions on where to have
the dinner. Both had different places in their minds and they were insisting on
them. I had to talk them into a common place and finalize the conversation
without any conflict. So I tried to backtrack and clarify their criteria to make
a decision. As it turned out, each of my friends had highly valued criteria;
one is concerned with the location and other one with food. Knowing their
criteria made it much easier to come to an agreement on where to have the
dinner.
Language and the words you use have a significant effect on your ability
to stay connected to your compassionate nature.
Communication that allows you to explain yourself -what you think and
feel, and connect with other people actually shapes the way you keep your
compassionate nature.
No comments:
Post a Comment